Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Waiting in Expectation

Jeff's challenge to meditate on Scripture had a successful first day. I was thinking about how Psalm 5:3 talked about David waiting in expectation after presenting his requests to God and what that should look like in my life. I figured my first chance to really apply it would be at this morning's quiet time. Often times I will write out my prayers and I can't tell if that hinders waiting. I guess it's the same to pause in spoken prayer or written prayer to allow God to reveal wisdom to you. I also know that Scripture and other people are where I most often receive godly instruction.

As I was praying/prayer journaling this morning, I was thinking about the requests I was making and how I would wait expectantly for responses. Especially those that are for other people. Obviously, asking them about it is a good way to see what God has chosen to do. But what about prayers such as guidance for the day? Often times I get sucked into the daily activities and don't even think about looking for where God might want to lead me (or if He is leading me and I'm unaware of it). I really started thinking about prayer and trusting God, especially with other people. I have a friend who has a tough situation that she requested prayer for. I am praying, but I struggle with wondering if my prayers are "powerful and effective" and whether a seeming non answer is a lack of faith on my part or God choosing to do something different. I want to share my prayer thoughts from this morning.

"...I pray that the situation would not be tense but be relatively easy. I know that You have the ability to make that happen. Please help me to trust You to do that. Help me to to trust that You hear my prayers and will answer them. I do struggle a lot with whether You will answer me. I feel like it must hinder my prayer effectiveness. God, I don't know why I am afraid to step out in trust. I have seen Your faithfulness. I am afraid that You will let me down and look foolish. What's wrong with being foolish? You are able to use the foolish, the simple, the meek, the unworthy. You are able to fill in all of the weaknesses with Your strength. Lord, I need You to help me trust You. I need You to help me trust You with my brother, the book, my family, my job, our house, my marriage. None of these things are completely within my control. Many of these things I have limited influence over. Only You can make and keep them blessings. You have influence like none other. You provide hope. You know more about these situations than I do. You know what is needed in each one. Father, help me to trust You and believe in Your goodness. Help me to be confident that You hear my prayers and will act in the necessary ways. Help me not to be afraid to ask You for anything. Help me to approach You confidently. Help me to not be afraid of a "no" or "not yet" looking like an unanswered prayer or evidence to others that You don't exist. I have seen Your hand in my life. You have and continue to provide for me. Help me to trust you at all times. Father, help me to wait expectantly for Your response to my requests..."

I love how in prayer God showed me that it is fear that hinders my trust. Fear of looking foolish in the eyes of others. Isn't it God's approval that I should be seeking? "But they do not know the thoughts of the Lord; they do not understand his plan" ~Micah 4:12 "God's voice thunders in marvelous ways; he does great things beyond our understanding." ~Job 37:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." ~Proverbs 3:5-6

I just need to be faithful and trust God to increase my faith and trust. If you can relate to any of this, please share your experience. I'd love to hear from you.

1 comment:

  1. Do not believe that you are the only person who feels this way. Often times I look at friends or church members and it is as if they have a direct line to prayer. While I on the other hand am stuck in "no" or "not yet" mode. I like to think that God is perfecting that in me that I will not release to Him. I like to think of it as not passing a test.He continues to give me a make up test until I get the passing score. Then again I think I focus too much on man and not enough on God and I have missed His answer. Don't know if that makes sense, but I can definitely relate. Keep blogging, don't get discouraged even if no one responds!!